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What are you feeling?

You don't have to tell me.  You don't have to tell anyone; after all, what could be more personal?  What i'm wondering is whether you're feeling anything.  Do you remember being in pain, and thinking about what it must be like to not have that pain?  i often do this.  When i'm sick, i imagine what it must be like to not be sick, but really what i'm imagining is what it must be like to not feel anything.  Lately, i've had a bit of pain, and so have spent some time imaging what it must be like to not have that pain.  But i've come to realize that it makes no sense to do so.  After all, i don't have pain everywhere, and i don't celebrate those areas that have no pain, and i think the reason is because i really don't feel them, they exist in a neutrality of sorts, like that eraser sitting in your 1st grade teachers blackboard tray that Bill Becker would get to pound the chalk out of at recess.  We spend the day in day out experiencing many things, but not feeling so much.  And that's to be celebrated.  You don't really want to be feeling, because those feelings are signals to the brain that something needs your attention, that there is news to report.  It's not necessary to imagine what it must be like to not feel pain, because you can't feel not feeling, and this is the normal state of things.  Or it should be.

David Strang gave Bill a snuggy while he was pounding the erasers..